If you think that a divorce is a big change for your life, you should know what the divorce means for your child. While children are resilient, they do need some sense of stability in order to thrive. A divorce throws their stable life into upheaval.
There are some ways that you can make the divorce a bit easier on your children. Think about these tips as you are working on rebuilding your life.
Leave your child out of it
This might seem like the last thing that you would expect to hear about child custody, but it is actually very important. You need to leave your child out of the negotiations. While your child needs to be the focus, he or she shouldn’t know what is going on with the negotiations. Don’t expect your child to choose sides. Don’t badmouth your ex. Don’t force the child to relay messages to your ex. Your child needs to know that both parents still love him or her, so make sure that you leave all of the negatives out of ears’ reach.
It is easy to become lost in the emotions of a child custody case, but this can work against you. You need to make decisions based on what your child needs and not on what will make your ex miserable. Try to think clearly as you are thinking about different options that you have for child custody arrangements.
Another issue with child custody cases is that it is easy to think about things in a way isn’t realistic. Instead, you need to think about things regarding how they will apply to real life. This can be difficult, but you must do it. For example, if you or your ex has a job that doesn’t always have the same schedule, such as if you are in the medical profession, a rigid child custody schedule likely won’t work for your case. Instead, you will need to have flexible elements that enable both parents to spend time with the child without having to quit a job.
In all cases, you need to make sure that you and your children are protected. This includes making sure that your and their rights are respected. This isn’t always easy in a child custody case, but it is imperative if you plan on having a child custody agreement that you and your children can live with.